A pretty bad one. In the time it took me to dig my phone out of my purse, and switch it into camera mode - he was still squeezing his bum. Also, it was not like this was a low-traffic area. He was standing at an intersection during five o'clock traffic. The reason I was sitting in the same place for so long is because I couldn't merge over due to the high traffic volume.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Posted by Layne Street at 1:01 PM
Monday, August 24, 2009
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
Last night - I looked over at my table and decided I didn't like it so I sold it on Craigslist this afternoon. Now I am looking for what I originally wanted (a 1950's chrome and formica - preferably yellow - set) and won't settle for anything less. Like this:
And to go with the sweet couch - I may need this sweet bookcase:
I know it's a lot of red - but the entire apartment is WHITE as white can be and needs a splash of color. I may have come up with an alternative to the white and it involves stretching a some fab-fabric over a homemade frame to cover a big chunk of white wall in my nook/kitchen (it's a studio...you can barely compartmentalize anything).
This is a relatively self-indulgent post. This is what happens when you have a lot of ideas and no money to fund them...
Maybe I'll redecorate my blog? More people see that than my apartment.
Posted by Layne Street at 2:07 PM
Thursday, August 20, 2009
I don't know how to change a tire.
Independence flies out the window when it's 10:15 at night and you've got a flat. I called my dad immediately and within twenty minutes, my own personal Triple A arrived.
I made an attempt at preparing the way by removing the jack from the compartment and putting it in the proper position. I also removed the plastic wheel cover as instructed by the laminated diagram that was also in the jack compartment. I tried to loosen the lugnuts but there was no give.
From the time he arrived until the time the spare was secured in place, it seemed like only five minutes had passed. Had I tried to be tire-savvy and replace it myself, the Lord himself probably would have had time to come back and fix it. Thanks, Dad.
Independent schmindependent. The second draft of my personal ad should now read, "SWF seeks SWM to build treehouse, carry in groceries (when SWF goes grocery shopping), and be on hand to change a flat (so my dad doesn't have to)."
Oh, also, "Make out a little."
That is all.
Posted by Layne Street at 12:22 PM
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
I was strolling along with one of my favorite furry friends last Saturday. This one rarely makes use of a public restroom so when I realized that I had left the poop bag behind, I was alarmed but not panicked.
Until we rounded the corner on our last leg and the pup started to slow down and waddle a little. Disaster. The only redemption to said disaster would have been to briskly finish the walk and drive back with the poop bag before anyone noticed. That was plan A.
When she had finished her business, I looked around and moved forward - knowing what my intentions were. All of the sudden I hear the door handle twist from the front door and the door whip open. "YOOOOOOOUUU PICK THAT UP!" The old man at the door was apparently not taking any crap from anyone. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I forgot my bag! I'll be right back! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I cowered as I walked forward. "WHY DO YOU THINK I HAVE BROWN SPOTS ON MY LAWN? PEOPLE LIKE YOU."
Of course I said I was sorry again- but I wanted to whip out my experience from the lawn care industry. Like, "Sir I know you're upset but have you considered the possibility that your lawn might be suffering from billbug infestation?"
Engage plan B - briskly walking back to the truck and driving back to the scene of the crime under intense fear of the old guy and his browning lawn. Would he still be standing at the door with the fury steaming from his ears...worse yet would he be holding a shot gun? Had he already contacted the police?
He wasn't and didn't. I scooped and drove away. I couldn't help but think...that was a really low point in my career.
Posted by Layne Street at 8:31 AM
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
I was hungry. And that produced a cart full of this:
1. Ritz Crackers. Something for the Easy Cheese (not pictured) to go on. I didn't know where to find the Easy Cheese at first. I was afraid I was going to have to ask the grocer. "Excuse me, where could I find a can of Easy Cheese?" "Oh, that's on the 'crap you should never put into your body' aisle."
2. Eight packages of Ramen for the budget conscious lunch-eater.
3. The reason I wake up in the morning: Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
4. California Pizza Kitchen pizza. I'm having someone over for dinner on Thursday and I can't cook.
5. Stouffers Spaghetti.
6. Ground turkey - the healthiest item in my cart.
7. Shredded cheese to make the ground turkey taste good.
8. And finally...frozen meatballs. I don't have anything to put with the meatballs. They just sounded good at 5:45 p.m. on an empty stomach. This morning? They don't sound that good.
Maybe next time I'll make a list. I can assure you the decision to buy Easy Cheese was purely on impulse.
Posted by Layne Street at 8:48 AM
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Who wants to come home to this?
A couple weekends ago, I was driving home to my apartment after another night of housesitting. This cop was on my tail for at least five blocks and I was in panic mode. The mode intensified when I parked in front of my building and the cop car pulled in directly in front of me.
I hopped out of the truck and walked toward the door as another police car whipped in and parked right behind the first one (as depicted in the photo above).
First thought? They found out about that car I stole.
I gingerly approached Officer # 2 and said, "Is everything ok?" "Yes." "Can I go in?" "Yes. Unless you are apart of the party we're about to break up."
I about said what about these pajama bottoms makes you think that I may have just left a party? And. It's seven in the morning...the only thing I just left was the drive through at McDonalds.
Turns out some beer pong tournaments don't wrap up until 7 a.m. Some neighbors really are that obnoxious.
Posted by Layne Street at 2:42 PM
Friday, August 7, 2009
In addition to being totally grateful for my extra work, today I'm really tired. Again - very grateful for the work...very grumpy from the actual work.
Posted by Layne Street at 12:27 PM
Thursday, August 6, 2009
I panicked and threw open the door only to find her sitting with her back towards me, perfectly still.
Posted by Layne Street at 8:44 AM
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
I'm not bragging.
There is no way that, in the midst of an economical down-turn, not only have I managed to hang on to my full-time job, but have also secured two other side jobs were it not for a small miracle. Just today, I was able to pay off three of my bills that have been outstanding for quite some time (not with credit cards - with money).
This is a big deal to me.
The background? I was at a point where I was not able to keep up with all my bills - certainly not able to make a dent in what I owed. I prayed. I prayed hard. I said, "Lord - I'll do what it takes, but please open a door for me."
A week later, I got a part-time job that eighty other people applied for. A week after that a project that had been stagnant for six months re-surfaced and now has me busy almost every weekend. It's a lot of work. But I am SO grateful. SO. Grateful.
See? Small miracle. Does the Lord have more important things to do than make ways for me to pay off my old mistakes? Yes. But they were weighing me down big time - and He cares about that.
This is a bit of a rant, a nice and happy one. I'm encouraged and I hope you are too.
If you aren't encouraged yet, may the following image lighten your load.
Posted by Layne Street at 3:28 PM
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Amidst the hustle and bustle (i.e. run to the store for extra ice and hot dog buns) - I spot these two boys in their driveway with the world's cutest lemonade/soda pop stand. It was complete with it's own hand-painted sign:
"Now, I need you guys to smile big and wave."
Posted by Layne Street at 6:40 PM