Saturday, June 27, 2009

Keepin' On Keepin' On.

Post # 100! Hooray! I felt like the content of my one hundredth post should be something really special - commemorative and moving. So here it goes:



Thank you.

Let me say of myself that I start more things than I finish so continuing to post here regularly has been something that I've been really proud of - if for nothing else than to practice this thing called communication. Articulation.

Along the lines of my incomplete projects - I've aimed my focus at a variety of different targets over the years. I've disappointed myself and others when I've decided that those targets weren't what I wanted anymore. These types of decisions stack up in the corner of my head and when the winds of change start to blow my dress up - I revisit the stack. The size of my stack makes me feel like a failure.

Now. One side of the coin reads "You suck!" while the other reads "You've tried a lot of things." Life is full of opportunities. Weeding through those opportunities can be really tricky. Do you always make the right decision? Absolutely not. Should you become paralyzed by your stupid decisions? Absolutely not.

Feeling like a failure does not lend itself to much momentum. We've but one lifetime to make an impact upon each other.

Having that said, how much would we let disappointment slow us down if we realized that there might be potential for greatness inside the very next decision (don't make me bust out the pre-presidential Abraham Lincoln biography)?

These have been...Deep Thoughts by Layne Street.

Seriously though - thank you for tuning in for the last couple of months. It makes my heart swell. In a good way.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

"Adventures In Not Dating" by LayneStreet

First of all, a little shout out to my friends at the pet clinic. Your faithful blog support moves me to bigger and better blogs.

Second of all, if I did write a book about the misfortunes of my dating history - it would make you laugh, it would make you cry, make you roll your eyes but mostly - it would make you throw up in your mouth a little.

One of the chapters would be entitled, "Long Distance Magnet." Whenever I meet somebody here in my hometown, they are inevitably just passing through - never local. It leads me to believe one of two things: 1. There is something in the water here - manners and work ethic are killed off early (at least in the 24-35 age bracket). 2. I have a sign on my forehead that says, "If you're leaving in two days, let's go ahead and establish a relationship."

Because of the sheer volume of out-of-towners I've met, it's more funny than sad to me. I'd really appreciate it, though, if you guys out there (Hi Mom!) would feel sorry for me.


Also, a little snap shot from "Adventures in Nannying."

Hot stuff doesn't begin to cover it.

P.S. The next post will be post # 100!

Friday, June 19, 2009

Where'd Your Pants Go, Sugar?

Will you humor me and listen to this dream I had last night? I've been pretty pre-occupied these days watching Arrested Development on Hulu ( So much so that I've developed a new celebrity crush:

Meet Jason Bateman who plays the role of Michael Bluth. Jason Bateman is my dinner date selection from the "random things about me" list a couple days ago. Anyway - he showed up in my dreams last night.

The sequence started in his driveway. He was teaching me how to longboard. He, apparently, is a master long-boarder. It was a great lesson. Then we progressed into his kitchen where he was preparing some sandwiches for the two of us. Just then, his twin sister Lindsey walks in (you know, Lindsey from the show). She scowled at me and then I noticed him looking at me with a bit of a puzzled look on his face.

I look down.

I'm not wearing any pants.

The thing that gets me is that I continued on for a while like nothing was amiss. Then I scurried off to their garage where Lucille (you know, Lucille from the show) has undoubtedly stored some of my winter clothes.

The dream then switched to me driving around in Las Vegas and he was gone.

It was brief...but it was magical.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Paying It Forward

Cue Price Is Right music:

Come on down (and post your ten random things, please!):

1. JamieDidIt
2. Wendie Gone Feral
3. The Kent Family
4. Michelle and Jesse (when you are done with your wedding - hooray!)
5. Absolutely I Do
6. This Is My Mixed Tape


Monday, June 15, 2009

Freestylin' - Fa Fa Freestylin'. Totally Ra Ra Random.

Alas, I am house sitting. When I am house sitting - it's tough to post because this isn't my computer. As soon as I am back on my home turf - I am going to compose my post re: lessons in assertive behavior. It includes a scene from Dirty Dancing. I tried to start on that post here at the house sitting house but when I was trying to pull up the Dirty Dancing clip I was looking for - it pulled up porn.


Not only did I eat all of the muddy buddies that were left on the counter, I'm probably going to get hauled off to the big house for lewd and lascivious conduct with the YouTube search engine. DANG it.

In the mean time, The Polka Dotted Owl ( tagged me to answer ten random questions about myself. Thank you P.D.O.

1. Had I been born a boy, I'm told I would have been named Tyler.
2. My least favorite thing ever to be called is "flaky."
3. I would really like to own an aqua blue '57 Chevy pick up truck.
4. I wear a size 9 1/2 shoe. Look out below.
5. When I listen to Dierks Bentley's fast songs, I drive a lot faster (especially around corners - it makes me feel like a hot outlaw...((now, with the muddy buddy eating and the YouTube porn, I won't need Dierk's help to feel like an outlaw)).
6. I pretend I'm on my phone when I'm walking by the pesky kiosk salespeople in the mall. Especially the really pesky cell phone salesmen.
7. Remember earlier when I mentioned the muddy buddies? I polished off the whole bag. It was a big bag. I almost don't want to have to face them again to get the second half of my paycheck - I'm that embarrassed.
8. If I can't find someone funny to marry - marrying be damned.
9. I have my future kids names saved in my blackberry - hope this thing still works in fourteen years.
10. If the following celebrities ever called and asked me out on a date, I would schedule them in this order: 1. Matthew Perry. 2. George Clooney. 3. Jason Bateman. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. Breakfast is my favorite.

Thursday, June 11, 2009


Success comes in all shapes and sizes. For me, this week, it looks like this (the sleeping - not the car seat straps - those are just a means to an end). Granted - this was right before I woke him up getting him out of the car seat. Still.

Meet my part time job; the cutest little paycheck in town.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Wide vs. White - The Great Debate.

In the land of co-workers, there is one special co-worker whom I shall refer to as the Hot Mess (the dual meaning of hot - she's gorgeous and she is always too hot and the mess...well...she's very organized but she is a mess: hot mess). Hot Mess told us a story today.

For the longest time Hot Mess was the victim of racism and she didn't even know it. When someone caught H.M. in the act of saying or doing something undeniably "white" (you know - dorky, unrhythmical, cracker'esque) as in, "wow, Hot Mess, your dance skills are pretty white," or just, "wow, Hot Mess, you are SO white," she was under the impression they were saying "wide." Insert "wide" instead of "white" and you have yourself a pretty nice compliment (minus the accidental and unlikely reference to weight - she's NOT wide in that sense) she thought.

All this time she thought her under-cover soul assasins were inferring that she had a broad range of talent or that she was a big person on the inside. Flattered as she was for all that time, she adopted the sentiment she had misconstrued and turned it into her own special blessing.

"That's mighty wide of you." - Hot Mess

Monday, June 8, 2009

Look Out, Fran Drescher.

Fran Drescher...circa 1994. That's right. I got a nanny job. Part time. And. I'm pretty excited about it. The kid is a looker, cute as a button. I hope you are ready to hear about diapers and boogers and the like. He is sure to be a whole world of material!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Heads or Tails?

Thought: It is nice to be in control sometimes - making all the decisions. When you know things are going exactly how you want them to go, it is a nice feeling. Sometimes it is nice to be the lead pony because you're in front and have the best view.


Sometimes it feels really good to release your grip and let someone else decide. Fall to the back of the line and be carried.

Pros: Relaxation. Cons: The view.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

I Ain't Your Backboard, Sugar.

I suppose all relationships can be considered rebounds unless you've never dated. However - I think you know when you are either being subjected to someone's rebounding or you, yourself, are the rebounder.

So - McHunky. I'm here for you. I'm just not here for you. Truth be told - I'm still hoping my other shot pans out, too.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Ladies and Gentlemen: There Are 24 Hours in a Day.

My friend Curly is honest as the day is long. She believes in me and my abilities and talents - she also recognizes the ugly, stagnant part of me -the part that gets stuck in the mud. Every once in awhile, she invests in my life and says - hey. Get busy.

A couple days ago - she reminded me that there are more than eight hours in a day. She knows I worry about losing the security that I have with my job. She also knows that SOMEDAY I would really like to give adventure a shot - put wings on some of my wild ideas. "Why can't you work AND pursue some of these things?"


You don't live to work. You work so you can live.


Thank you, Curly. Your support gives me a lot of courage.