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Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
The Time I Said the Thing About Boobs
Last Friday night, the little band and I sang for a benefit that honored local survivors of breast cancer. It was a big night. There were 450 people in the room. The emcee was my favorite local news anchor. The speaker for the evening was none other than Geralyn Lucas. She wrote "Why I Wore Lipstick to My Mastectomy." This girl was hilarious. She was all about telling her story and making sure women understood the facts about breast cancer.
The ladies in the room were incredibly receptive to the speaker and seemed really excited during the raffle. I eventually learned that they were receptive to Geralyn because she had an amazing story and had a way with words. They were excited during the raffle because they were giving away free wine and purses. When the time came for us to entertain the crowd, I was pumped...over-confident even. We took the stage with great energy.
It came time for me to sing Natural Woman for these ladies and I was excited because I had rapidly prepared an intro that I was sure would convey both my awareness about the issue at hand and my winning sense of humor.
You see, when I sing in the shower...Natural Woman is the song I sing. So between the time the speaker discussed the importance of self-exams and the time I took the microphone, I composed the following statement:
"Ladies, the next song is one of my favorites. In fact, it's the song I sing in the shower. However, I'm reminded this evening that singing isn't the only thing I should be doing in the shower."
Nothing. Not a laugh. Not a clap in support of the practice I was promoting. Perhaps the crowd was uncertain of which practice I was promoting - it was clear that the guys in the band were definitely uncertain of which practice I was promoting as evidenced by their raised eyebrows and itchy posture.
The evening eventually got better. I got to stand right next to the real funny lady and someone took a picture of it.
The ladies in the room were incredibly receptive to the speaker and seemed really excited during the raffle. I eventually learned that they were receptive to Geralyn because she had an amazing story and had a way with words. They were excited during the raffle because they were giving away free wine and purses. When the time came for us to entertain the crowd, I was pumped...over-confident even. We took the stage with great energy.
It came time for me to sing Natural Woman for these ladies and I was excited because I had rapidly prepared an intro that I was sure would convey both my awareness about the issue at hand and my winning sense of humor.
You see, when I sing in the shower...Natural Woman is the song I sing. So between the time the speaker discussed the importance of self-exams and the time I took the microphone, I composed the following statement:
"Ladies, the next song is one of my favorites. In fact, it's the song I sing in the shower. However, I'm reminded this evening that singing isn't the only thing I should be doing in the shower."
Nothing. Not a laugh. Not a clap in support of the practice I was promoting. Perhaps the crowd was uncertain of which practice I was promoting - it was clear that the guys in the band were definitely uncertain of which practice I was promoting as evidenced by their raised eyebrows and itchy posture.
The evening eventually got better. I got to stand right next to the real funny lady and someone took a picture of it.
You can tell by my facial expression that I was hoping she wasn't listening to a thing that came out of my mouth that evening.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Happy Trails
I tried bird having.
I failed. Maybe some other time. Maybe not.
Either way, this sweet little thing really was enjoyable. However, a studio apartment and two cats made things a little difficult.
Goodbye, sweet little Feather Face!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
The Type Of Day You Dream About
Sincerely, I just lived that type of day.
First of all, my Bu Bu declared today some sort of holiday in my honor. It was around 10:00 this morning when I saw his FB post. My eyes welled up with tears and I felt incredibly special from thousands and thousands of miles away.
We laughed most of the day. My co-workers and I were giddy with anticipation over an awards ceremony which we were all attending later in the day. The awards ceremony was in honor of the top ten best places to work in the state. We were honored to be in the top ten. The winners were to be announced later at the ceremony.
People sent me sweet notes all day to let me know that they loved and appreciated me.
Flowers fresh from the middle east arrived around 3:30 this afternoon. The flowers marked week number two and only fifty more weeks to go until the man comes home for good. Talk about sending someone over the top. What a sweet thing to see come through the doors.
Then we made it to the awards ceremony. We waited as the countdown begin. We weren't in tenth place, ninth, eighth...so forth. We were voted BEST place to work in the state. We screamed. We cried. We laughed about how we screamed and cried. First place.
It was a magical day and I have my sweet boyfriend, my workplace and Jesus to thank for it. My heart was flooded with all kinds of love and happiness today - so much so that I didn't know what to do with all of it. Everyone deserves a day like today.
I am a lucky, lucky, lucky girl.
First of all, my Bu Bu declared today some sort of holiday in my honor. It was around 10:00 this morning when I saw his FB post. My eyes welled up with tears and I felt incredibly special from thousands and thousands of miles away.
We laughed most of the day. My co-workers and I were giddy with anticipation over an awards ceremony which we were all attending later in the day. The awards ceremony was in honor of the top ten best places to work in the state. We were honored to be in the top ten. The winners were to be announced later at the ceremony.
People sent me sweet notes all day to let me know that they loved and appreciated me.
Flowers fresh from the middle east arrived around 3:30 this afternoon. The flowers marked week number two and only fifty more weeks to go until the man comes home for good. Talk about sending someone over the top. What a sweet thing to see come through the doors.
Then we made it to the awards ceremony. We waited as the countdown begin. We weren't in tenth place, ninth, eighth...so forth. We were voted BEST place to work in the state. We screamed. We cried. We laughed about how we screamed and cried. First place.
It was a magical day and I have my sweet boyfriend, my workplace and Jesus to thank for it. My heart was flooded with all kinds of love and happiness today - so much so that I didn't know what to do with all of it. Everyone deserves a day like today.
I am a lucky, lucky, lucky girl.
Meet Barney
Because two cats just aren't enough for my studio apartment...meet my new alarm clock:
He is an interesting little addition to my menagerie. I've never had a bird. I'm pretty sure I never got one because I heard they were loud and messy.
Turns out - they are loud and messy. But look...
He gives kisses. And whistles. And, so help me God, he'll be able to sing the 'How I Met Your Mother' theme song. I think he was actually trying to sing it this morning but it came out sounding more like a car alarm.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Happy (almost) Tax Day, Ahmeri-cuh.
Last night on the radio I heard we're going to have $5 gasoline this summer. I may have to modify my bicycle (basket, rear rack, side car, air conditioning/misting system) because it sounds like we'll be spending a lot of time together from here on out.
Bu Bu teases me and says he left the country for work because he couldn't afford gasoline anymore. Upon hearing last night's news, I'm not so sure he is teasing.
Ahmeri-cuh? Really? At $5 a gallon, people won't be able to afford running their lawn mower - let alone their vehicles. People will be squatting in their yards with kitchen shears to keep their lawn looking nice. Is that what you want?
Squatting?
Bu Bu teases me and says he left the country for work because he couldn't afford gasoline anymore. Upon hearing last night's news, I'm not so sure he is teasing.
Ahmeri-cuh? Really? At $5 a gallon, people won't be able to afford running their lawn mower - let alone their vehicles. People will be squatting in their yards with kitchen shears to keep their lawn looking nice. Is that what you want?
Squatting?
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