Layne Street

The Reality Show I Want to Be On

2011-05-11T09:37:00.000-07:00

The Voice. I love Vicki!

The Time I Said the Thing About Boobs

2011-05-02T19:56:00.000-07:00

Last Friday night, the little band and I sang for a benefit that honored local survivors of breast cancer. It was a big night. There were 450 people in the room. The emcee was my favorite local news anchor. The speaker for the evening was none other than Geralyn Lucas. She wrote "Why I Wore Lipstick to My Mastectomy." This girl was hilarious. She was all about telling her story and making sure women understood the facts about breast cancer.

The ladies in the room were incredibly receptive to the speaker and seemed really excited during the raffle. I eventually learned that they were receptive to Geralyn because she had an amazing story and had a way with words. They were excited during the raffle because they were giving away free wine and purses. When the time came for us to entertain the crowd, I was pumped...over-confident even. We took the stage with great energy.

It came time for me to sing Natural Woman for these ladies and I was excited because I had rapidly prepared an intro that I was sure would convey both my awareness about the issue at hand and my winning sense of humor.

You see, when I sing in the shower...Natural Woman is the song I sing. So between the time the speaker discussed the importance of self-exams and the time I took the microphone, I composed the following statement:

"Ladies, the next song is one of my favorites. In fact, it's the song I sing in the shower. However, I'm reminded this evening that singing isn't the only thing I should be doing in the shower."

Nothing. Not a laugh. Not a clap in support of the practice I was promoting. Perhaps the crowd was uncertain of which practice I was promoting - it was clear that the guys in the band were definitely uncertain of which practice I was promoting as evidenced by their raised eyebrows and itchy posture.

The evening eventually got better. I got to stand right next to the real funny lady and someone took a picture of it.

You can tell by my facial expression that I was hoping she wasn't listening to a thing that came out of my mouth that evening.

Happy Trails

2011-04-28T16:55:00.000-07:00

I tried bird having.

I failed. Maybe some other time. Maybe not.

Either way, this sweet little thing really was enjoyable. However, a studio apartment and two cats made things a little difficult.

Goodbye, sweet little Feather Face!

The Type Of Day You Dream About

2011-04-21T20:36:00.000-07:00

Sincerely, I just lived that type of day.

First of all, my Bu Bu declared today some sort of holiday in my honor. It was around 10:00 this morning when I saw his FB post. My eyes welled up with tears and I felt incredibly special from thousands and thousands of miles away.

We laughed most of the day. My co-workers and I were giddy with anticipation over an awards ceremony which we were all attending later in the day. The awards ceremony was in honor of the top ten best places to work in the state. We were honored to be in the top ten. The winners were to be announced later at the ceremony.

People sent me sweet notes all day to let me know that they loved and appreciated me.

Flowers fresh from the middle east arrived around 3:30 this afternoon. The flowers marked week number two and only fifty more weeks to go until the man comes home for good. Talk about sending someone over the top. What a sweet thing to see come through the doors.

Then we made it to the awards ceremony. We waited as the countdown begin. We weren't in tenth place, ninth, eighth...so forth. We were voted BEST place to work in the state. We screamed. We cried. We laughed about how we screamed and cried. First place.

It was a magical day and I have my sweet boyfriend, my workplace and Jesus to thank for it. My heart was flooded with all kinds of love and happiness today - so much so that I didn't know what to do with all of it. Everyone deserves a day like today.

I am a lucky, lucky, lucky girl.

Meet Barney

2011-04-21T11:39:00.000-07:00

Because two cats just aren't enough for my studio apartment...meet my new alarm clock:

He is an interesting little addition to my menagerie. I've never had a bird. I'm pretty sure I never got one because I heard they were loud and messy.

Turns out - they are loud and messy. But look...

He gives kisses. And whistles. And, so help me God, he'll be able to sing the 'How I Met Your Mother' theme song. I think he was actually trying to sing it this morning but it came out sounding more like a car alarm.

Two Things

2011-04-15T14:25:00.000-07:00

1. This cat is cute.

2. I am loving this song and her dress.

Happy (almost) Tax Day, Ahmeri-cuh.

2011-04-15T08:59:00.002-07:00

Last night on the radio I heard we're going to have $5 gasoline this summer. I may have to modify my bicycle (basket, rear rack, side car, air conditioning/misting system) because it sounds like we'll be spending a lot of time together from here on out.

Bu Bu teases me and says he left the country for work because he couldn't afford gasoline anymore. Upon hearing last night's news, I'm not so sure he is teasing.

Ahmeri-cuh? Really? At $5 a gallon, people won't be able to afford running their lawn mower - let alone their vehicles. People will be squatting in their yards with kitchen shears to keep their lawn looking nice. Is that what you want?

Squatting?

Chick vs. Rabbit

2011-04-14T08:34:00.000-07:00

An attorney friend bought me a wind-up Easter bunny and bought a chick for herself and we pitted them against each other in an epic battle for supremacy.

My bunny went all Thelma and Louise. Children, please look away.

Sad.

Anyway...

Last night my little band (it's not the 'Layne' band...just the band I sing for) played a corporate party. It was an awards ceremony for the employees - one where every employee gets an award. It was like the Dundees...some of the 'achievements' were equally as...made up?

After all the awards were handed out, we played, played, played and they danced, danced, danced. The highlight of the evening (aside from the meal...) was the fifty-something lady in a fancy dress singing along to Cee-Lo's 'F [insert Forget] K You.' Girl knew every word.

That's all. Hope you're having a hoppy day. : /

One week down.

2011-04-13T15:23:00.000-07:00

My Bu Bu has been gone for one week today.

Only about 51 more weeks to go.

Everything is better with karaoke.

2011-04-12T23:43:00.000-07:00

Well. I was wrong about a couple things.

1. The Nut House? Just a real live sports bar full of really nice people and fully dressed men. There was a lady there with uncommonly short shorts, but aside from that...no nudity.

2. I only know two songs on the guitar.

When open mic'ing winds down, there might be someone in the crowd who owns a laptop, a hard drive with thousands and thousands of karaoke songs. When we ran out of songs to play, we just started k.j.'ing for four or five people that wanted a chance to shine. And let me tell you - there were some stars out tonight, for sure. I was uber impressed.

The night went from high pressure to easy as pie in a few minutes. People love karaoke and loved us by proxy.

Whisker Watch Alert!

2011-04-12T07:06:00.000-07:00

Please take the time to view the following:

This has been a whisker watch alert.

Open Mic Night

2011-04-11T21:26:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow night begins a new musical adventure. My pal and I are starting an open mic night at a local sports bar.

I'm concerned for a few reasons:

1. Are sports bar customers really going to be interested in the acoustic music we have to offer? I'm having flashbacks of accidentally walking in front of the television during Monday Night Football when I was a little girl. It was never a good idea...and I wasn't even making noise then.

2. The place we're gearing up to play at is called (screw anonymity) 'The Nuthouse.' [Insert wincing emoticon here]. I've never been to this venue and I'm not entirely sure it's not a strip club for ladies (think Thunder Down Under...only much less toned).

3. I only know three songs on the guitar.

I'm pretty sure free drinks are apart of my contract and I'm sure everyone else will be drinking so that will act as a little buffer between the discriminating ears of the Nuthouse patrons and my less than prepared self.

Playing with Legos

2011-04-11T14:54:00.000-07:00

Via Pinterest

Looks like someone else in their 20's is still playing with Legos. I'm not sure I'm fully behind these little pumps, but on the other hand, they would be better conversation starters than puppies and babies.

Sunday Funday

2011-04-10T21:19:00.000-07:00

Praise the Jesus for Sunday Funday. It's been a rough week in a lot of respects and it was nice to be in community, in good company and to be...well...drinking a little bit.

Post church and Buffalo Wild Wings with my Facebook Official sister, I hit the streets on my new bike. This is probably, most definitely too early to say this...but I think this one is a keeper. She's smooth like butter, light weight and beautiful in all the ways that count. And. She got me all over town today. Here's a few highlights:

At the end of the day, I can't help but wish life were a little more simple but good friends and Skype really keep the ol' chin up.

The Green Machine

2011-04-09T19:59:00.000-07:00

The Brown Bandit is vying for the attention of local Craigslisters. In the meantime - I've found a very capable replacement. One that is a much better fit for me.

Meet...the Green Machine:

The Green Machine is so smooth. I purchased it from a local non-profit bike repair shop that recycles donated bikes. They put the right parts together and sell solid, affordable bicycles. This little shop has a great reputation and they deserve it. I had a great experience today.

Hopefully my bad bicycle ju-ju has worn off. I have a feeling the G.M. and I will be very happy together.

The Brown Bandit, Appendix B

2011-04-08T12:12:00.001-07:00

The tire was flat at lunch.

My pant leg got caught in the chain guard.

My bum REALLY hurts.

I'm selling the B.B.

The Brown Bandit, Appendix A

2011-04-08T08:43:00.000-07:00

My spring bike riding season has not started like I planned. I suppose the idealistic picture of me pedaling down the street in a sundress and ballet slippers set the bar a little high. No butterflies have landed on my hands, I don't have a tan yet (granted, I'm still in long sleeves and have only been on the bike a total of an hour an a half) and I have yet to install a bell.

Here's how things really started.

The work day ended yesterday and the weather was pretty sunny. So. It was time to take the Brown Bandit out on the town. My first stop was the local bike shop that tuned her up for me. My fender brackets keep popping off so I wanted to see if they could fix them. Keep in mind that the B.B. is about fifty years old and nothing is the standard (modern) size. Alas, the bike wizard could not fix the fender brackets. Only a special part from a hardware store would do the trick...if I could find the right size. 'Eh,' I said and decided to ride on yesterday.

I took to the local green belt for the rest of the ride. It was pretty delightful, I'll say that. As I was whizzing (plugging away) past the trees and the river, I was reminded of why I got the bike in the first place. Then the wind kicked up. I felt like I was going backwards and it wasn't long until my lips were dried to my teeth. Magical...right.

Then came the right angle turn I wasn't anticipating. The last bike I had was a cruiser and the brakes were engaged when you pedalled backwards...the B.B. has hand brakes. I swerved! I ran into the dirt and nearly ran into the post that said 'slow.' I didn't fall down. Success. These types of things don't happen unless someone else sees, right? Just as the thought crossed my mind I heard, 'Are you alright?'

Damn it.

'Yep. Just a new bike. Doin' fine. Thanks.' He says, 'Well, what you should have done was applied the brakes just a bit sooner.' I thought the gentleman buzzing past was trying to be funny. So I said, 'Zip it.' He just kept riding. I turned around and went home soon after that. In the quiet of the side streets near my apartment, all that could be heard was the creaking and squeaking of my old bike. Add injury to insult (I know), my bum hurts like crazy. The old seat is pretty but it feels like I'm sitting on a two by four.

Regardless of my misplaced euphoria, I made the decision to ride to work today. I walked down to the bike rack and there it was. Flat tire. I was not shaken. I pumped that thing up and made it to work just fine.

If it's flat by noon, I'm putting the Brown Bandit back on Craigslist.

I LOVE technology.

2011-04-07T20:23:00.000-07:00

Hello from emotionally stable Layne. Today was a huge improvement from yesterday. No melt downs (especially no melt downs in front of partners...except for the tear that welled up in my eye when I choked on an almond). The countdown is on and that brings me a whole lot of hope and happiness!

Speaking of happiness, technology (free technology at that) brought me plenty of happiness when McW and I Skyped over my lunch break. Here's a snap shot of the session:

Technology is going to make this adventure a much more enjoyable one.

Don't hug me, I'll cry.

2011-04-06T13:58:00.001-07:00

Seriously.

My man left for the middle east today. I've redone my make-up four times already.

He's the type of man that does whatever it takes to get the job done. Even if it means giving up a year of his life to live in the desert. I'm very, very, very impressed by who he is and proud of how much initiative he has.

Love. Him.

Weekend Getaway

2011-03-31T22:03:00.001-07:00

It's likely that this weekend is the last one McW and I will get to spend together before he leaves the country for work. I'm taking the day on Monday to elongate the weekend and that opens up a tiny world of opportunity.

We're considering a couple options.

1. The mountains. It's only April but we are dying to get away and build a campfire and do some fishing. There are a few options an hour or two away. The only obstacle? The elements. Snow and cold may get in the way but there is always cuddling.

2. Some sort of gambling location. We are pretty close to a couple regional gambling centers. It's the black jack. I can't stop thinking about it.

It may be best just to head into the mountains. The mountains are indisputably beautiful...72 year olds with worn out coin cups and hot pink lipstick? Less beautiful.

Here's to weekend adventure!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

It's the Brown Bandit!

2011-03-31T12:52:00.000-07:00

Craigslist and I are on very good terms at the moment. I purchased the bicycle pictured below from a tiny, tiny little man for $60. It's in the shop right now for a quick tune up and some new tires but it will be ready tomorrow.

Spring hit hard today. Sunroof open? Check. Window down? Check. Better attitude? Check.

And it's payday? WHAT!? Little chunks of heaven are just falling from the sky today. Here's hoping all of you (hi Mom) are experiencing the same kind of good fortune.

Tomorrow is payday...

2011-03-30T12:29:00.000-07:00

So today, I'm trying to keep myself distracted from mentally spending it all.

How? With the following:

1.) It's pretty nice outside. Nice weather = cheap thrill.

2.) Tiny Wings.

3.) Work. In between looking out the window, Tiny Wings and writing this entry.

But tomorrow? It's ON!

Oh yes.

OH! Yes.

The dress? Jcrew. Our sweet little town just picked up J.Crew in our shopping mall. It's been a long time coming.

The shoes? Urban Outfitters. They're suede. And awesome. And just the right height.

Alright. Back to Tiny Wi...back to work.

The case for the DODOcase.

2011-03-29T15:22:00.000-07:00

For those of you who like to keep things simple...and for those of you who are lucky enough to own an iPad (or Kindle):

The DODOcase.

I don't necessarily know how to express my excitement over this discovery. It's been around for a while...I'm just a little slow on the uptake. It's nearly pay day and this case is VERY reasonably priced (a deadly combination).

The only decision left to make is which color to get on the inside?

Who am I kidding? That butter cream yellow one has my name all over it.

Need to buy one too?: http://www.dodocase.com/.

Chanandler Bong

2011-03-28T12:33:00.000-07:00

'Crackers. Because your cheese needs a buddy.'

Things I Would Appreciate in My Home:

2011-03-25T10:09:00.000-07:00

For the record player, the books.

For the T.V. and components.

For my head. And bed.

For the fun of it.

A huge improvement on my already red coffee table.

To replace the boring chair in my corner.

For the bathroom.

I've had A LOT of spare time on my hands lately (unfortunately). I've been on Craigslist and design blogs (mostly mylittleapartment.blogspot.com and re-nest.com) all week. Now I want to throw away, organize and purchase some more functional furniture. Furniture that is less 'I've had this since I was 19.'

All photos from re-nest.com.

Cats and Karaoke...maybe Gambling?

2011-03-24T09:50:00.000-07:00

The lives of McW's feline and mine have intersected and I plan to post a much more in depth synopsis of their progress. However, I don't plan on doing it until there is a happy ending. At present, they are definitely still trying to figure out why the hell they are stuck in the same studio apartment together.

We did catch a rare and musical moment on camera the other night. Here it is:

It's possible that we are the only ones that think this is funny - but I'm sharing it with you on the off chance you find a little humor in it as well.

We left the little fur balls alone together last night when we went to a dinner party with some great friends. This was my kind of dinner party:

1. Bowl of Cheetos on the counter.

2. Plenty of wine.

3. Two huge helpings of lasagna.

4. Brownies. Brownies made with crushed up pieces of Thin Mints. Yeah.

Post over-eating, we hit the town for a little karaoke. We walked into one of our favorite watering holes to find it totally packed. Still, we each made our song selections and handed them in. An hour and a half later, McW finally got to sing one of his favorites.

Then I tried one that I haven't sang for karaoke before: Mr. Big - The Next to Be With You. I've got the hair for it. Turns out that people like to sing along with that one. Singing along just makes you feel good. When you look out at a room full of people singing the song you're singing, you're all friends. So. I'm adding Mr. Big to the karaoke arsenal.

Also included in the arsenal:

Natural Woman - Aretha

Gold Digger - Kanye (including the sexy backup dancing courtesy of McW)

Lastly - we're considering a trip over state lines this Sunday. What lies over state lines? Gambling. The hope of multiplying what we're going down there with.

Here's hoping!

The Day Nature Tried to Kill Us

2011-02-23T13:50:00.000-07:00

Starring:

McW as himself

and

Me as myself

Take Me Back There, Please.

2011-02-22T16:59:00.000-07:00

I'm on the other side of a fabulous vacation with my love (yeah!) and I'd like to go back now.

The Wink of the Car Salesman

2011-02-15T12:32:00.001-07:00

Here I am in the waiting room of my preferred Ford dealer. My little SUV is undergoing the first oil change of it's life since I adopted it.

My observation over the course of the last few minutes is this: there is power, power, wonder working power in the wink of a car salesman. A brief mention of another dealer's policy regarding a free oil change? Wink! Done. "I'm sorry it's so dirty! I meant to get it washed beforehand." Wink! Done.

He is even offering me 50 smackers if I send someone his way.

Granted, sometimes a wink from a salesman can mean absolutely nothing (other than, 'I'm about to steal your money'). In my very fortunate case, it means "I'm going to work really hard for your business."

Thanks, preferred Ford dealer.

Signed,

Satisfied Customer

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

My Valentine.

2011-02-14T10:06:00.001-07:00

He's a man among men.

Happy Valentine's Day!

It's My Birthday!

2011-02-11T15:32:00.001-07:00

Today I turn twenty-six.

Twenty-six has big shoes to fill, twenty-five was the best year of my life so far. I did more, saw more, said more and felt more than I ever had before. I fell in love with life and summer all over again. It was a brilliant year.

Today I am thinking of my Grandpa who shared a birthday with me. He was simple and tall and strong and good. I miss him. I miss all of them and remember a lot of sweet birthdays with my grandparents.

I'm thinking about the trip my darling and I are taking next week. I'm going to see the Grand Canyon for the first time. That's a great way to start to start a new year of life - that and five days of uninterrupted time with McW.

I'm also thinking about the Anthropologie birthday discount I got in the mail. Nothing says 'happy birthday' like 15% off your entire purchase.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Spring is springing.

2011-02-09T13:35:00.000-07:00

1. Baby woodpecker.

2. Open sunroof.

3. Fresh white flowers budding on my desk.

Speaking of making it big...

2011-02-07T16:41:00.000-07:00

I got a random act of kindness present last fall from Curly. It was this little Oriental Hyacinth bulb. It comes with a vase and a bulb and instructions. It serves as decor (eventually) and a lesson in patience. You have to store the bulb in a cold dark place (the fridge) for about three months and then you can bring it into the light.

Here's what you have after the first three months:

I know. After three months? An onion with an over-sized shoot of asparagus sprouting from the top?

I sent McW a picture of it and he promptly renamed the little plant the 'phallus lonelywomanus.'

He's funny.

But alas. Just three days after shooting that photo - this is what greeted me this morning:

It's not done growing and blooming, but that's pretty good progress.

The progress looks a little like cauliflower but still. Progress.

If I Ever Make It Big by LayneStreet

2011-02-07T09:59:00.000-07:00

If I ever make it big, remind me not to accept the invitation to sing the national anthem at the Super Bowl. I will inevitably erase all the good I've done with my little career when I forget the words.

If I ever make it big, remind me not to accept the invitation to perform during the superbowl half time show. I'm not Paul McCartney or Janet Jackson. It won't be good.

If I ever make it big, I'm going to Disneyland.

Addendum to February 1st Post

2011-02-04T15:40:00.000-07:00

I said this here.

I will confess that I already went back on my word as of February 3rd. My reasoning? I had to wear them because if I wouldn't have, I would have looked like a Russian street walker (hussie, floosy, wh-oore). It was a necessary (it's still stupid winter) evil.

2011-02-03T16:42:00.000-07:00

To Love and Be Loved

2011-02-03T09:40:00.003-07:00

..is to feel the sunshine on both sides.

In little kitty's case, the sun is mostly just right there in her face - but I'm pretty sure she feels the love.

Either that, or this will be the author photo on the back of her book jacket - the book that she will write after she escapes from her domesticated oppression.

An excerpt? Ok...

Day 678:

Here I sit, blinded by the sunshine that is magnified by these studio apartment windows. I can barely move as I have constant access to the 'food' the witch puts out for me. "Are you hungry, little kitty witty moo moo" she'll coo at me. That stuff won't cure the hunger but the chewing gives me something to do.

I belong out there...with those squirrels. With the feral cats. With the free cats...I'm developing a plan.

I imagine it would be something like that.

It's February

2011-02-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

...and I'm done wearing tights. I'm freezing but I am DONE.

Goodbye static cling.

Hello creamy white legs.

It's McW's Birthday!

2011-01-31T14:47:00.000-07:00

Isn't he ridiculously handsome?

Chilly Little Fun Havers Addendum

2011-01-26T13:59:00.000-07:00

Here are some shots that were captured from last weekend.

The boys enjoying the hooky-bob. Way more fun than climbing back up the sled hill.

McW showing the pup the way of the hooky bob. He really loved it, despite the look on his little puppy face.

Paparrazi McW capturing what ought to be our friends' 2011 Christmas Card moment.

This is me. I'm enjoying the hill but, as evidenced by the hand brakes, a little frighted by it.

Maybe you'd be a little frightened too if this is what stared you in the face.

Seriously though, is this not beautiful!? Wow.

A Hankering...

2011-01-26T10:35:00.000-07:00

...for fresh crab (eating) and sea lions (watching).

If it's going to be rainy here - might as well go where it's rainy AND delicious/entertaining.

LOST

2011-01-24T18:46:00.001-07:00

As in, I LOST countless hours of my life hoping that all the time I invested in watching this show would result in all the questions of life being answered (and for Sawyer and Juliette to miraculously find each other on the Island).

Neither of these things happened. Spoiler alert for those of you who haven't yet watched the series finale. I watched the seasons in real time... I just didn't get to watching the finale until last night.

All I'm grateful for at this point is the fact that they didn't string me along for another four seasons...or in LOST context, 137 more plot lines. Seriously, writers, if you intend on introducing a new plot line after every commercial break for six seasons, you better be prepared to conclude each one.

I don't know if I will be able to trust you again, ABC. I just don't know.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Chilly Little Fun Havers

2011-01-21T13:52:00.000-07:00

It's time. We're making the tiny little trek back to one of my favorite places on Earth to spend some time in the snow. And a little more time eating food and drinking beer.

Over the new year's weekend, we did the same and had a blast!

See...

Our friend T-Rav (with some assistance from McW) hollowed out the most amazing sledding run.

The pup made it all of three seconds, but I'm sure she loved every minute.

And I'm somewhere in the middle of this cloud of fresh snow.

I'm excited to do this all over again this weekend. Here's to some friends, lots of food and all the snow I can ingest whilst flying down the hill.

Fine, fresh, fierce...

2011-01-19T09:10:00.001-07:00

...I got it on lock.

I've been singing a lot of top 40 songs lately...hence the Katy Perry lyrics that are stuck in my head all the time.

This is the first post of the new year, which is disappointing to me because it's the 19th of the month. I didn't even participate in the obligatory 'new years resolution' post. Oh, I thought about it. Just didn't pull the trigger.

During the last service of the year at my church, the guest speaker discussed the concept of the new year's resolution. He made the point that a date on a calendar isn't motivation enough sometimes. We can all relate to that.

However, there is something about a fresh calendar, January 1st, that is pretty thought provoking to me. I go into re-organize and re-evaluate mode. The year is new and sparkly to me right about now - I don't want to smudge it up with my un-organized dullness.

Given my track record, I will end up doing something that I consider "smudgy" and it will mess with my new year's momentum. Still, I really enjoy evaluating and re- organizing some parts of my life. So what if it's only once a year? : /

Some of the areas I've been looking at are pretty basic, tangible changes. My closet, for example. Re-organized and much nicer to look at in the morning. My iPhone and iPad apps (this just means that all my game apps are on the same page...still, I feel it counts).

Other areas are still tangible but a little more of a process. I'm excited to buy that bike I talked about a long time ago. McW has started running again and it has me thinking about the way I take care of myself and the things that I enjoy doing that would keep me (get me) in shape. I love my town and my specific location - I could bicycle anywhere in 15 minutes or less. So, step one? Buy killer bicycle. Step two? Ride the hell out of it. Step three? Bikini model with the lung capacity of an opera singing triathlete.

Then there's the money thing. Money management is always something I think about at this time of the year. This is the area that always gets "smudgy" first. So instead of budgeting every single penny, I'm going to try to give more. Hopefully that will come easier and help me re-evaluate my priorities.

So I suppose this is the obligatory new years post. It will serve as some accountability for me and it should kill at least 4 to 5 minutes of your downtime at work (wink wink, ladies).

Happy 2011!

West coast represent.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Thoughts on Greeting Cards

2010-12-16T11:11:00.000-07:00

If you make the decision to buy a blank greeting card - make sure of the following things:

1. You've got plenty to say.

Or

2. You've got a big signature.

Drinking Problem

2010-12-14T11:18:00.000-07:00

McW and I both own cats that have drinking problems - unconventional drinking habits, that is.

Take Kitty McW... he had us rolling one lazy Sunday afternoon:

And then there is my feline...who always has a wet head (and now I know why). I'm considering renaming her 'Ross.'

Take that, Winter!

2010-12-06T16:31:00.000-07:00

Snow decided to show up early this year. Not only was it early but it fell in North Dakota-like quantities. It's gorgeous.

However, the snowfall was like the nail in Summer 2010's coffin. Life has not stopped since it got cold, but it is certainly different. We're still busy but in different ways. Now the plan is to do the same to the winter season as we did to the summer - live the hell out of it.

The fun began this weekend. We drove home from church on Sunday and, on a lark, decided to grab our fishing gear and head out to one of the ponds we fished at this summer. It was frozen over and I was excited because I've always wanted to ice fish. McW knocked a couple of holes through the ice and we stood strong against the cold and watched our bobbers float on the icy water.

There was a quick strike at the worm right in the beginning, but no luck. Still, we felt triumphant about being there at all. "This is awesome," we said.

Then on the drive home we stopped along the river. We tromped through the snow and stood along the bank. I tossed my line in and reeled the spinner across the river and, to my amazement, I got a bite! I was too surprised to set the hook and actually catch the fish...but it was a beacon of light in a fishless winter season. I told McW the good news and he tossed his line in and within minutes...

...Take that, winter!

Sweet Liberty

2010-11-24T16:07:00.000-07:00

Only one hour left until the four day weekend.

And.

Only one more holiday until I get to decorate la apartmenta for Christmas.

Thanksgiving should be great this year. Combining McW's parents and my parents for the first time over Thanksgiving dinner number one, playing football (Friends style!) and then Thanksgiving dinner number two with the rest of McW's family. I'm looking forward to the whole day - I'm hoping to sneak in mimosas and the parade for breakfast.

Have a happy Thanksgiving, blog land!

Lungs.

2010-11-23T16:37:00.000-07:00

Sara Bareilles has a fine set of lungs. She came through town last Friday and just knocked our collective socks off. I've never heard someone sing the notes she sang at that concert. I was inspired and depressed all at the time time - she's just good. All kinds of good.

And.

She cussed like a sailor and dressed like a man.

Could she be any cooler?

Here's an illegal video snipet:

Also. The Cary Brothers Band opened for Sara and the bassist from the band wore the worst/most awesome t-shirt I've seen in a long time. I was fortunate enough to get this picture with him and his t-shirt:

Snow.

2010-11-22T14:05:00.000-07:00

On my way of out of my building this morning, this view greeted me from the end of the hallway. The snow seems a little early this year but it's not unwelcome. It's gorgeous!

Love me like a superstar, play me like a steel.

2010-11-19T11:42:00.000-07:00

Little Big Town came through town again last night. This was my third LBT concert and they only get better.

The concert venue that most of these bands come through is just little. They sell general admission tickets and you just stand and stand and stand. Pro? If you get there early enough, you can get insanely close to the action up on the stage. Con? There is no clearly defined space bubble. We the people - the concert going public - are left to govern our own concert listening space. This is effective until you realize that your definition of appropriate concert listening space is different from someone elses. My scale of irritability varies depending upon my level of anticipation and enthusiasm for the performers on stage. Little Big Town is my second favorite musical group. I was a neurotic space governor last night.

I'm not proud of myself. I was uncharacteristically rude to the security guard and really rude to an overly talkative, attention-starved brunette in really tall heels. I'm not going to beat myself up over it because the guard and the brunette sort of had it coming. However, at the end of the day - the guard was just doing what he was told to do and the brunette was annoying but was attempting to be considerate.

Anyway. The music.

The first thing about LBT that takes my breath away is how tight their harmonies are. They have been singing together for twelve years and so I'm sure it comes with the territory. Still, their ability to pick the right notes and sing them until the swell fills the room is captivating.

The second thing that comes to mind is the warmth that they all deliver when they are on stage. They all have a sparkle in their eye and a smile on their faces all the time. I don't think it's contrived for stage presence purposes. I think it's overflow from their hearts - I think they genuinely love what they decided to do with their lives.

My favorite songs from last night were 'The Reason Why,' 'Bring It On Home To Me,' and 'Fire.' I was excited to see them do the build into the last part of 'The Reason Why' and they delivered. 'Bring It One Home To Me' has always been a favorite LBT song and when they started singing it, it was like seeing an old friend. 'Fire' was fun because I had my favorite someone there to kiss.

Little big thanks to Jimmy, Karen, Kimberly and Phillip. You guys deserve so much more recognition than you receive. You are wonderful.

We ruv'a a karaoke!

2010-11-18T10:36:00.000-07:00

McW, our friends and I LOVE to karaoke. There are plenty of spots around town that we hit up on a pretty regular basis. We have met some seriously awesome people making our rounds on our karaoke tour.
One of the most memorable karaoke outings we've had was a couple months ago at our favorite dive. We walk in and spot a table full of soul sistas and bruthas (as McW would preface - this is not racist, it is just a fact) who, you HAVE to know, can sing the hell out of any song. I was intimidated. McW? Not so much. He picks out his favorite Smokey Robinson tune and begins. There was no need for him to be intimidated because within the first two measures of the song, one of the bruthas was on the floor bowing before him.

What happened next was too precious not to catch on video...

That's right. Back up dancing.

Meppy Thanksgivmas!

2010-11-17T15:45:00.000-07:00

As I stated on a Facebook status today, there are only eight days left until I put up my Christmas tree and decorate my apartment. I love the way everything is going to smell and I'm going to love turning all the other lights off to let the lights on the tree shine.

This year, more than any other of the years in my brief history, has gone by so fast that the upcoming holidays don't seem to fit yet. The fact that Thanksgiving is one week from tomorrow has me almost unsettled. We don't even know what we're doing for Thanksgiving yet. I've been watching the third season of Friends and what I'm most concerned with is organizing a football game like that one Thanksgiving episode. I feel like it's time.

"Too scary!"

2010-11-15T16:12:00.000-07:00

This video is hilarious.

Oh! My face hurts from the laughing.

The Feline - Attack.

2010-11-10T10:38:00.002-07:00

Sigh No More

2010-10-12T12:03:00.001-07:00

1. Watch please: http://music-mix.ew.com/2010/10/12/sugarland-sigh-no-more-mumford/.

2. If love is done right - it's supposed to help you hone in on the best version of you.

Oh it's been a long time.

2010-09-22T12:34:00.000-07:00

Well howdy, deserted blog-land. You're still looking goregous.

I died and went to a summer-type heaven. I've been sent back to spread the good news, however. Adventure? It's out there. Time? It's on your side if you talk nice to it. "Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape." Change those "I'd like to's" to "Man, that was awesome's." Consider that the recap.

Today I watched the following video on YouTube:

It made me smile.

Happy Tuesday.

2010-09-14T10:16:00.000-07:00

Silly little fun havers.

I Don't Know but I've Been Told...

2010-08-31T08:48:00.001-07:00

...if you ain't busy livin' than you're gettin' old.

Sorry, blog.

You know the rules. So do I.

2010-07-22T11:22:00.004-07:00

I'm 25. I've never seen this music video. I YouTubed and Wikipedia'd it to better understand the term "Rick Roll."

Rick rolling: is an Internet meme[1][2] typically involving the music video for the 1987 Rick Astley song "Never Gonna Give You Up". The meme is a bait and switch: a person provides a hyperlink that they claim is relevant to the topic at hand, but the link actually takes the user to the Astley video. The link can be masked or obfuscated in some manner so that the user cannot determine the true destination of the link without clicking. When a person clicks on the link and is led to the web page, he or she is said to have been "rickrolled". Rickrolling has extended beyond web links to playing the video or song disruptively in other situations, including public places;[2] this culminated when Astley and the song made a surprise appearance in the 2008 Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade,[1] a televised event with tens of millions of viewers.

It took me a moment to realize that this is the actual music video and not an exaggerated parody.

For Halloween, I want McW to be Rick Astley and I want to be either one of the blond chicks or the dancing bartender.

I'm a Mess.

2010-07-19T09:00:00.000-07:00

And I like it.

Let's start with my truck: In the back of my truck there is a half empty case of bottled water, lots of sand, my old chucks that are covered in sand, my pink hoody, my fishing pole, and the washers game board. There is also (this is a little gross) trout blood on my tailgate.

In the cab of my truck there are random groceries, sunflower seeds, sunflower seed shells, sheets of music and a couple towels.

My apartment is dusty. My sink is full of glasses and cereal bowls. There are tufts of the feline's fur floating in every corner. I did laundry last week and there is already a full basket waiting to be done.

Let's not talk about my bank account.

The point of my full disclosure? All of these little messes have a story or because of a story - little adventures. Summer finally arrived and I can't find a reason (or am in complete denial regarding the reason) to not enjoy it on a daily basis. I'm tired, sun burnt and poor. Still - not good enough reasons.

I hope you've made plans to have as much fun as humanly possible this summer.

Crazy Cat Lady

2010-06-29T09:24:00.000-07:00

Listen. I realize that everyone thinks their animals are cute - more cute than the average animal. Like, "Yea, your cat (or dog) is cute, but my cat (or dog) is unusually cute..." Who's the judge of the cuter animal, anyway? It's generally the unfortunate listener who throws in the towel (who doesn't want to hear any more pet stories) that hands out the verbal medal of achievement, "Oh, THAT is cute."

Seriously though, my cat is really cute. I've got pictures.

Still in the closet. That's bound to change when she meets Joan from across the hall.

I'm not sure she is going to make it through another summer with all that fur. The Stylist suggested we shave her like a lion. If she keeps sneaking into my closet and leaving little fur deposits, I may take her up on the offer.

However, she may find some reprieve in stealing a drink here and there from my mug.

See? Way cuter than your cat.

I also realize that most women are in denial about their 'crazy cat lady' status.

I know I just posted a blog about all the cute things my little feline does.

However. I only have one cat and I don't even own a pair of slippers.

Happy Weekend, Sugar!

2010-06-25T15:29:00.000-07:00

We've all made it to the weekend. By the time I am finished with this little recap, it will be 5:00 p.m.

I've been looking forward to tonight for quite some time. My co-workers (some of the fun-having ones) and I are heading out to the ol' ball game. I love our local baseball games. Also - I love fireworks. There will be fireworks after the game tonight. Could life be any sweeter?

McW and I have a bag of peanuts and high hopes for a hometown win. Swing, batter batter!

It's all about who you know.

2010-06-17T09:02:00.000-07:00

Connections.

If you know the right people - you can get away with anything.

For instance, a local company has been working with a local cleaning company. I hear that the local cleaning company does a horrible job and charges quite a bit for that horrible job that they do. They've been doing a horrible job for years.

They get to keep doing a horrible job because the owner of the local cleaning company is friends with the one of the owners of the local company. And that is that.

I hear that the local company has complained multiple times to the local cleaning company and nothing has changed. Were this cleaning company owned by someone who wasn't friends with one of the owner's of the local company - they would have been replaced. They would have been replaced by a local cleaning company that cleans.

Were I providing a service for a friend and his/her company - I would be embarrassed if I did a poor job and would be even MORE embarrassed if someone had to complain more than once to get my attention.

As it stands - the local company will continue operating in their building that is riddled with cobwebs, dust, crumbs, sticky floors and smudgy windows. The local cleaning company will continue to be oblivious because, in the end, it's not about the quality of the service you provide - it's all about who you know.

Seamstress Extraordinaire

2010-06-15T10:36:00.000-07:00

This last Saturday I made a pot of coffee, two Eggos and two shoulder bags. I intended to make only one shoulder bag - but my pattern was a bit too large (GIANT) for it's original purpose (disc golf bag) so I made number two. I was so proud of my idea and the execution of the idea (right down to the fact that I remembered how to use a sewing machine...) that I took play-by-play photos. I shared them with my good friend, the Stylist. Sidenote: her blog is located on 'My Favorite Stops' and it's called 'WineSperation' - give it a looksee. You'll not be disappointed. Now - I'll share them with you (hi Mom!).

The pattern pieces all laid out (including the brown nylon lining underneath - I cut up an old skirt for the lining).

Aforementioned brown lining. That skirt never looked better. It was at this point that I should have realized that the pattern I made was MUCH too large for a disc golf bag. I didn't. I persisted.

The bottom and the sides of the exterior.

My proudest achievement: the side pocket.

The completed (nearly) bag. In this photo it looks cute and dainty. In reality...

...it was too big to even be considered as an airline carry-on. Note the strap - the really, really long strap. I'm not so good with proportions.

I did sew an entirely different bag out of an old t-shirt and shelf lining. It will do for now. I will probably pick out some new material and give it another shot.

I will also put the feline in her cage before I start the next project. Her added ass-istance was unappreciated.

What's on YOUR Mind?

2010-06-11T09:22:00.001-07:00

Facebook - LAY off! Sometimes I just want to sit with you in the quiet without you constantly wanting to know 'what's on my mind.'

However, on my mind are a few different things.

The first being the fact that I've camped out each weekend for the last two weekends and I feel as though if I don't sleep outside tonight, the Earth may fall out of orbit.

Ok. Maybe it won't.

But I'm crazy about the idea of leaving for a night or two and renting a tent space from Mother Nature (and the Parks Department). The more often, the better. Looking back at last summer I realized that I spent one night in a tent last summer. That's it. Why? I had nineteen jobs. I was a house sitter and a baby watcher. I used to joke about the fact that I couldn't wait for the day I needed a house sitter. If the feline wasn't as self-sufficient as she is, that day would be upon me. Yes. I have arrived. I'm busy - busy having fun.

The second thing spinning around in my mind is my disc golf game, namely my driving technique. Yeah. There are techniques. The one McWHYBAML and I tried last night was called the 'X Step.' Curiosity piqued?

We're learning. And in the process, we lost two discs in the water traps. The daring McDub hopped into one of those water traps and attempted to find the one I lost. Sigh.

Lastly - Daphne Willis. She sings songs. I heard her on the radio last Sunday and I had one of those instant "I like this" reactions. I checked out her website this morning and discovered her music video for a song called Everybody Else. It features Cookie Monster. I like this even more.

The weekend is nearly here. HAPPY Friday!

Lazy.

2010-06-07T12:23:00.000-07:00

It was pretty difficult for me to get out of bed this morning. I had a pretty sweet weekend and the fact that it was already Monday seemed more abrupt than usual.

When I finally tossed the covers off and headed towards the shower, I noticed that my little feline was perched atop the stack of pillows on the left side of the bed. She's normally up and at 'em when I am. She makes her way to sit on the toilet when I'm in the shower and then on to my vanity when I'm curling my hair.

Not today.

As I was making my way out the door, she was still curled up on the pillows. My resentment for my little sleeper-inner was no match for my adoration - she's pretty cute.

The resentment will return with a vengeance when I get home tonight and discover exactly how much fur she has left behind on those pillowcases (that I washed on Saturday).

Mom and Dad - This One's For You

2010-06-04T14:28:00.000-07:00

Earlier today, via Facebook, my mom posted a status update that said, "Hey Daughter, you need something new on your blog. Something about how wonderful your parents are. Thanks."

Ok, Mom.

A good Mom memory: When I had the flu in the second grade - you turned the guest bedroom into a Nintendo room and made up the twin bed with that pretty awesome quilt and you brought me lunch on a tray. You let me play Nintendo all day long that day. That was wonderful.

Alright, Dad.

A good Dad memory: When I was a junior in high school I was driving around a cool but not as dependable as it could have been Mazda Protege. The stereo had been stolen out of it and you told me you were going to get it fixed. You came home that night and told me to come out and look at the stereo. When I walked outside, there was a brand new (to me) Honda Accord. It was a huge surprise and that was wonderful.

My facebook status should now read, "Hey, Mother. Maybe you should tell all your facebook friends how wonderful I am. Thanks."

Big Ol Blog Failure

2010-06-04T12:50:00.000-07:00

I've been taking in a lot of life lately and it seems like none of it has transferred over from experience to documentation. I'm sorry, blog. Have I told you lately how cute you look?

Now for some random slices of life that I'd like to share:

McW and I are big frisbee golf fans. I've made mention of that a time or two. At any rate, one of the things that I love about where we go to frolf are the people we end up meeting. For the most part, people are just out to have a good time and drink pretty heavily. We become fast friends with these people.

Along with our love of frisbee golf, we also love to check out the local sheriff's department website. Each day they upload the previous day's arrests complete with mugshots for all to see.

The connection? At least two, if not more, of our new frisbee golf friends have made an appearance on that website. You think you know somebody, right? So far, we've only had run-ins with light-weight criminals...but who knows. The next time we tee up, we may narrowly escape with our lives.

And in entertainment news, The Executioner, McW, Brother McW and his lady - One Bad Ass Chick (OBAC for short) went out on the town to sing some karaoke last night. This is always a great adventure for this specific group of people. Brother McW and McW both hammered out some Stevie Wonder and I tried my hand at an Aretha number. Each time we go out for the karaoke, it makes me wonder if we shouldn't start performing together...maybe a cover band?

That's about all. Again, sorry blog.

Want A Song Stuck in Your Head for Three Weeks Straight?

2010-05-26T09:57:00.000-07:00

Ok.

You're welcome.

McWHYBAML and I are going to see these cats live in June. Easy on the ears, they are! I'm excited!

REPOST: Miss Independent - UPDATE

2010-05-21T08:49:00.000-07:00

UPDATE: Since posting this last summer, 50% of my personal ad dreams have come true. I will say it's closer to 75% since I rarely ever go to the store...maybe even 100% because I don't even own the yard to grow the tree in to build a treehouse.

Life is good. Why? Because if he can change his own tire...

...he can change mine.

REPOST:

I consider myself pretty independent. I learned last night, however, that the depth of a person's independence is equal to the depth of their knowledge.

I don't know how to change a tire.

Independence flies out the window when it's 10:15 at night and you've got a flat. I called my dad immediately and within twenty minutes, my own personal Triple A arrived.

I made an attempt at preparing the way by removing the jack from the compartment and putting it in the proper position. I also removed the plastic wheel cover as instructed by the laminated diagram that was also in the jack compartment. I tried to loosen the lugnuts but there was no give.

From the time he arrived until the time the spare was secured in place, it seemed like only five minutes had passed. Had I tried to be tire-savvy and replace it myself, the Lord himself probably would have had time to come back and fix it. Thanks, Dad.

Independent schmindependent. The second draft of my personal ad should now read, "SWF seeks SWM to build treehouse, carry in groceries (when SWF goes grocery shopping), and be on hand to change a flat (so my dad doesn't have to)."

Oh, also, "Make out a little."

That is all.

Things I Miss

2010-05-20T08:15:00.000-07:00

In no specific order:

    O'Boise Potato Chips.

    Playing the stuffed animal crane game.

    Not realizing what a giant waste of money playing the stuffed animal crane game was.

    Those white pair of Pumas with the blue suede stripe down the sides that I got from the Executioner.

    The local cheese factory.

I'm either hungry or six years old - but those are the things that are on my mind this morning. Happy Thursday, Sugar.

Rebel with...High Cholesterol

2010-05-18T10:22:00.001-07:00

I really like chocolate chip cookies. I love chocolate chip cookie dough. So much so that no amount of bold labelling on cookie dough packaging would deter me.

Clearly, if they had to put that on the package, I'm not alone in my cookie dough quirk. Who doesn't love cookie dough? Moreover - don't you buy the cookie dough at the store to eat the cookie dough? I do.

When I worked at TCBY - the best part of my job was the box of cookie dough in the walk in freezer. Was it ethical to remove (gloved) handfuls of said cookie dough? No. Was it delicious? Yes.

On an unrelated note, I've been having chest pains for the last 24 hours. I think it has something to do with the marathon Frisbee golf day McWHYBAML and I had on Saturday. Either that, or my arteries are slowing closing from my unhealthy eating choices.

May the record show, Nestle Tollhouse, that if I do check out - it will be from blocked arteries and not from salmonella.

Happy Friday, SUGAR!

2010-05-14T14:48:00.000-07:00

Here's a special treat for your ears, eyes and that little voice inside you that says, "I wonder what it would be like to blow up a piano."

I'd like to blow anything up today. It's not that anything is wrong or bad - it's just Friday and I feel like a chinchilla in a crayon box. It's time for fun and free time. One hour and twelve minutes until freedom. High five!

The Stylist and I

2010-05-11T15:02:00.000-07:00

How'd she get her name? Well. She is responsible for my mane. She keeps it looking like it does.

I love the foil part. It allows me to realize some of my rodeo queen hair dreams.

Today was a day of decisions as I wanted to do something different with all this hair. When you've got long hair, generally the only thing different to do is cut it. I'm pretty picky about the color (have been ever since Mom dyed my whole head yellow ((love you, Mom))). I thought about opting for something like this:

Turns out I'm just not ready to make the change. This head of hair and I have been together for a long time. It's a pretty good partnership.

Countdown to Sugarland: 3 Days

2010-05-03T11:58:00.000-07:00

While trying to figure out a way to get backstage to the upcoming Sugarland concert, I stumbled across Jennifer Nettles' new blog. I'm convinced we'd be good friends were we afforded the luxury to meet one another. She's a personal hero of mine - I assume that once I see her perform live, the feeling will only grow.

She's an entertainer. Read this. You'll be entertained.

Blog From Jennifer–A Not-So-Day-In-The Life

April 27, 2010

“A Not-So-Day-In-The Life” by Jennifer Nettles

Everyone likes to think the life of a musician is all parties and Dom, private jets and shopping sprees. For some, this may be true. For me, it is not, and this fact has been known to disappoint a few people (Though these are the same folks that scurry to read the “Stars: They’re Just Like Us” section of the celebrity rags which captures and displays, for the amusement and amazement of the tabloid hungry viewers, celebrities at the grocery, buying coffee, pushing their kids on the swing, picking their noses etc etc. Hypocritical of those folks to clamor for Brad and Angie’s cotidien, kid-infused pictures strolling the hairspray aisle at the drug store, while hoping to see me swinging from the chandeliers, but I digress…..). However, as I have had a stellar day today, fit for a Robin Leach voice-over, I thought I would share it with you for your voyeur within.

This story is set in Las Vegas where I am to celebrate the ACM’s. I don’t particularly care for Vegas as it makes me think of Disney Land for drunk adults who stumble around without looking where they are walking, blissful to have left the rugrats with the grandparents and, consequently will then proceed to drink as if they’ve just been released from prison. I have to be in a wildly festive mood to darken the door of a casino as it is largely ruled by four of my least favorite things:

1. Drunken adults making up for lost time in gymboree or church so they party like it’s 1999. Again.

2. Recycled Cigarette Smoke. This is where the casinos, in a effort to keep people inside and gambling, allow smoking but try to cover it up with some sort of coconut scent which just ends up smelling like a coconut flavored ass on fire.

3. Cold. In an effort to keep people awake (and to keep the burning coconut ass smell less noticeable) the temperature of a casino is freezing. Remember my olympic blog? I’m not very fond of the cold.

4. Loud, continuous, dinging noises. Annoying unless one is completely smashed or 3 years old.

Now I realize that my personal opinions of our fair City of Scandal may make me sound like a complete and total itch-bay. But, fear not my sweet swillers of sin, I have found an oasis in this dinging, drunken, neon desert and am able to actually enjoy myself on several levels!

I love being from the East Coast while working out West. The time change works in my favor and allows me to feel complete Virgo satisfaction by having me naturally wake before 7am. This is the case today. I casually make my way down to a lazy breakfast where I sip green tea and write in my journal until my breakfast arrives at the table: egg white fritatta and a side of mixed berries.

After breakfast I go and work out. The hotel has a really nice gym and I don’t feel like I need to disinfect every inch of it. Plus, since it’s Vegas and most people are here to forget their minds as well as their bodies, I pretty much have the place to myself. Another perk!

After my workout I stroll by the spa desk and make myself an appointment for a massage. I return to my room and had a shower with some yummy smelling bath products by Bulgari, provided by the hotel. By this time I need some lunch in order to make my massage appointment on time (and since I had breakfast at the ass crack of dawn, I am hungry already anyway:-).

I make my way to the restaurant where I proceed to read Bust Magazine, seated outside, until my fish tacos arrive. The kind waitress asks if I want a glass of wine to which I reply, “I’d like all of them but I can’t today”. I pay my bill and head in the direction of the spa.

The spa is wonderful with comfy robes and, my favorite, cucumber flavored water. (I love this stuff. I also read somewhere that there was a smell test conducted on men and women to see which scents were the most arousing. For women it was cucumber. For men, pizza. No joke. Hey, I read it, so it must be true right?!). I meet my therapist, chose an essential oil scent I like (too bad they don’t have pizza oil as an option. I’m interested), and have a wonderful massage that leaves divets in my face for about 2 hours. I also buy some face moisturizer because I am currently almost out of mine and do not want to be caught in a desert without some.

After my massage I return to my room, read some more, doze a bit, make some phone calls, send some emails and take another shower to wash off the pizza scent, just kidding, to wash off the massage oil.

Presently I am sitting outside by the pool, having a snack and listening to the three little british children in the pool say things like, “Duddy, I wont to du a hondstond in the wotah” (translation: “Daddy, I want to do a handstand in the water”). These are the only children I’ve seen here (Probably because they’re British and don’t know that children aren’t allowed in Vegas and that they should have left them with grandmummy and grandduddy. Poor things are probably trapped here in the Icelandic volcanic ash business!). I came out here to sit and read, but ended up writing this blog instead, and to let my hair dry in the arid desert breeze because I left my hairdryer at home. Duh. In the meantime, I wish you all “champagne wishes and caviar dreams”.

New Look!

2010-04-29T15:30:00.000-07:00

Oh, Jenna! Thanks so much for the great new design. You were ever so patient and awefully quick on the 'What I want' uptake!

Check her out:

Hooray!

I Don't Believe in Peter Pan, Frankenstein or Superman!

2010-04-21T15:18:00.001-07:00

All I wanna do is: Bicyle! Bicycle! Bicycle!

I've purchased a bicycle. And it's beautiful. So beautiful that I'm afraid to lock it up on the bike rack outside. So.

It's doubling as unconventional decor and additional seating.

Globe Trotter...

2010-04-20T11:40:00.000-07:00

...I am not. I don't own a passport.

My goal, by next time this year, is to 1) acquire a passport and 2) use said passport for more than a secordary source of identification. I'm not sure I care where I go - although I do have Dublin programmed into my iPhone weather tracker (I can tell you that this Sunday it's supposed to be 59 degrees and mostly sunny there).

Thats all. I'm ready to fly the friendly skies sometime in the near(ish) future.

Take it easy, Monday!

2010-04-19T12:01:00.000-07:00

Monday threw up all over my desk this morning. There was no easing into it (aside from the Cinnamon Dolce and the blueberry scone) - it was pedal to la medal.

Oi!

Good thing it was a great weekend.

T.the Lord.I.F.

2010-04-16T09:08:00.001-07:00

Curly (a.ka. Boss Lady) is heading out of town today for a few days today.

She's a pretty unconventional boss.

The office is pretty bare - lots of folks gone. This translates into a 3:00 p.m. chips and salsa party at the reception desk.

We informed Curly of the plan to throw the party at the reception desk and her parting instructions were, "Don't forget about the beer in the fridge."

Thanks, Curly! Have a nice trip!

The Life.

2010-04-15T08:51:00.000-07:00

Happy Scrabble Day, Sugar!

2010-04-13T23:03:00.000-07:00

It's upon us again, friends! National Scrabble Day. McW and I celebrated in style. In addition to spending nearly three hours playing the game today, McW even formulated a spreadsheet that totals possible word scores. I don't know that anyone showed better Scrabble Day spirit than the two of us.

We are currently pitted against one another in a likely seven game series. He's up 2 to 1...but after we finish what we started this evening...we'll probably be tied up, 2 to 2. It was, and will continue to be, an intense rivalry.

I remember having more fun than these snapshots indicate. We were concentrating - and consulting the Scrabble dictionary. A lot.

Don't judge.

Jesus Pageant

2010-04-12T12:28:00.001-07:00

T.G.I.M. I've never said this in my life. After this weekend, it's a totally appropriate sentiment.

My friend, The Executioner, and I were asked to lead worship at a girl's conference last weekend. Little did we know, it was a girl's pageant. That's right. Dresses, tiaras and satin capes pageant - for Jesus. There were bright spots during the weekend - but I still shudder a little when I think of some of the things I heard and saw.

I thought to myself (and out loud to some close confidants)...is this really beneficial? What are we teaching these girls? Does the Lord look at something like this and say, "I'm really glad this is how they are spending their weekend! You - a little more Vaseline on those teeth! You - your sash is crooked!" Granted, right now he is probably saying to me, "You - quit being so critical ... and I've got a few things you should straighten out, too."

Touche', the Lord, touche'.

Still. I had a pretty negative reaction to what went on this weekend and I'm still trying to process it. I believe down deep (real deep) that someone probably started this program with good intentions. Teaching girls about the confidence that comes from knowing that God has a plan for their lives is right on. Teaching girls that the reward for learning about that plan is a tiara and a title? Pretty left of center, in my opinion.

Rant. Over.

The Executioner and I did manage to take these photos before our last run at the talent portion of the pageant. Enjoy.

Under Construction

2010-04-08T15:55:00.000-07:00

Blog. Looks. Gross. I'm working on it. In the meantime, here is the inspiration for this evening's musical project. Wish us luck.

Sauted. Sealed. Delivered.

2010-04-08T08:18:00.003-07:00

I based my grocery list off that fun little blog I mentioned yesterday. I'm glad I did. For dinner I made a mushroom, onion, avacado and egg scramble. I snuck in some feta cheese and wrapped it up in a whole wheat tortilla.

My mom called while I was cooking and the conversation went like this:

Mom: Hey! What are you up to?

Me: I'm sauteing some mushrooms...because that's what grown-ups do.

We all have different definitions of adulthood and what the threshold is. Sauteing mushrooms was my rite of passage.

To the Grocery Store I Go

2010-04-07T15:39:00.005-07:00

Say a prayer for the grocery store recluse - I'm headed that way. I'm going because of this blog: acakeforawife.blogspot.com.

I'm really only going to buy what she puts in her oatmeal. That's right. Oatmeal for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Back in the Saddle Again

2010-04-06T10:27:00.002-07:00

Recently, I answered yet another Craigslist posting. This one was for a local composer looking for someone to do a little singing for his compositions. McW and I met up with local composer and local composer's wife a couple weeks ago to hear about the project.

Turns out, they are super nice people who don't run their business out of a meat packing plant (praise the Jesus). I headed up their way last night for a recording session and had a ball. We're working on an R & B number this week. Why? Because I'm a soul sister at heart.

I'm really excited about another opportunity to do this thing that I really love to do. Hooray!

Happy April Fools, Sugar!

2010-04-01T11:59:00.003-07:00

Well. I got pranked. I believe I said to Curly yesterday, "We need to stay on the offense against the pranks so we're not on the defense this year." But we got lazy (or didn't have any energy left after last year's shenanigans).

Or so I thought.

The Stylist dropped off a little gift on my desk last night after I had left for the day (with a little bit of help from Curly...).

Just wait, my friend. Just wait.

We Drove. We Danced. We Conquered.

2010-03-29T12:32:00.006-07:00

I'm still smiling from our quick jaunt up to Montana. The oh-so-fun couple threw a great reception! It was really great to cut loose with my family (including my karaoke king Dad and my Black Eyed Peas lovin' Mama) and life of the party boyfriend.

Ah, the cake and the happy couple. They are equally silly and are a perfect fit.

Speaking of silly...

...while the photo above captured what seems to be a rather tender moment - McW and I managed to cut all sorts of rugs on the dance floor. Lots of spinning, some of the running man and a pretty good rendition of the 'Carlton.'

And.

There was plenty of karaoke to be enjoyed. Some of my favorite performances from the evening included Mr. Roboto (sung by the bride), Shoop (..ba doop ba doop ba doop..sung by the sister of the bride), Vanilla Ice (sung by the groom) and the wide variety of hits performed by my personal Entertainer of the Year which included Luck Be a Lady and Tears of a Clown. The photo above is from Islands in the Stream. Ah ah.

Thanks for getting hitched, you two. We had a whole bunch of fun!

Heading for the Bitterroot

2010-03-26T14:05:00.003-07:00

This weekend, McWHYBAML and I are headed to Montana for my cousin's wedding reception. My family is a boat load of fun. My cousin married a super fun man and so their little shin dig should be a whole lot of fun.

Here's the happy couple.

Hopefully McWHYBAML and I return a happy couple after a weekend of nearly non-stop driving!

Happy Friday, friends (hi Mom!)

Team Bowersox

2010-03-24T09:59:00.002-07:00

I like this girl. I like her attitude. I hope she wins. My favorite part (aside from the really good performance) is the interaction with Seacrest at the end. Her personality is blossoming and blossoming. Go KBow!

P.S. A little paint thinner will take Miley's sharpie right off that guitar! Don't you worry your dready-little head about it!

Polar Bear Sunbathing

2010-03-21T15:26:00.003-07:00

While looking down at my glowing white legs during church this morning, I felt it was time to take action. I sent a text to the Executioner to see if she was in for a little 'second day of spring' sunbathing - of course she was. Nurse Wonderful was on board as well.

Today is cloudy, windy and mildly unwarm. However. A couple years ago we made clever use of a 54 degree February day and the community hot tub. We'd lounge in the hot tub until we were close to heat stroke and then slather up and lay in the pseudo sunshine.

My phone said temperatures were going to reach 62 today. I figured we would be in the clear. Two words: brrrrrr rrrrrrr. We spent 98 percent of our time in the hot tub. However. I did manage to capture this peacefully crisp moment:

A for effort, I suppose.

Wee Little Gingabolls

2010-03-18T19:32:00.002-07:00

My adventure in nannying is drawing to a close. I have two more nights left. I will have my evenings back and no extra money to spend! It's bittersweet.

My little paycheck has grown up a lot over the year. The first week, it was an accomplishment to get him to sleep. Now he is feeding himself, running all over the place, helping put his diapers in the trash and, recently, learned how to pinch my derriere'. Instinct? I think so.

I'm really going to enjoy the free time but I'm really going to miss watching him grow up.

- LayneStreet (brought to you by iPhone)

Happy St. Patty's Day, Sugar!

2010-03-17T10:09:00.003-07:00

I can always count on the attorney I shall refer to as 'Hollywood' to exhibit some holiday spirit. He's Hollywood because he is charming and traditional and reminds me of a good old movie.

There is always a Christmas tie, a flag tie and yes - a green bowler hat for St. Patrick's Day.

2010-03-16T15:51:00.002-07:00

Also. Today reminds me of this scene from the movie that I love. Here's to Dayquil and plenty more days that look just like this one.

Happy Sick Day, Sugar!

2010-03-16T12:45:00.005-07:00

So I have a little bug of some sort - it's drippy and achy. I slept a lot yesterday and watched a couple movies. I slept in today and went to work at noon. I was sent home at 12:45.

I bragged about not being sick all winter. What a stupid thing to brag about. How much better would it have been to be sick in the middle of winter than to be sick on the warmest day of the year thus far?

The sunshine is beaming in through my open windows and I have mixed emotions about it. On one hand, spring really has sprung and it's beautiful. On the other hand, the sunshine is casting all sorts of light on the dust that is resting comfortably on all the ledges and nooks in my apartment. I'm idling and it brings out the OCD in me.

I'm going to fight the urge dust and cozy up with some o.j. Hell or high water, I'm blowing this popsicle stand tomorrow morning.

All Fore It

2010-03-14T22:33:00.005-07:00

The man and I played thirty-six holes of disc golf yesterday. We met a variety of personalities and enjoyed a couple root beers. It was the ideal Sunday afternoon activity.

And this...the ideal disc golf form.

Jack of Some Trades. Only Some.

2010-03-11T11:50:00.006-07:00

I'm heading in for lesson number two at the meat packing plant tonight. My homework this last week was learning the 'Jig of the Irish Washer Woman.'

Done.

I told lesson man that I wanted to learn the mandolin part from 'Landslide.'

Look out, Marti.

The excitement of learning always spurs a kind of avalanche in my thought life. The more I learn, the more I want to learn and I worry if I'll ever catch up.

This is probably a happy problem to have.

Insert High Pitched Screechy Violin Sounds

2010-03-05T09:53:00.006-07:00

McWHYBAML bought me a mandolin for my birthday. I am in love with it. I need lessons. So I craigslisted "mandolin lessons" and found a place.

Last night was my first lesson. I could barely find the place. The only building I saw was a meat packing plant. According to mapquest - I was in the right place. I looked a bit closer and discovered a sign with an arrow "Music Lessons THIS WAY."

I pulled around to the back of the building and parked.

A few things went through my mind upon arrival:

1. I found this place on craigslist. People die answering craigslist postings.

2. This 'studio' is on the backside of a meat packing plant. On the other side, I wonder if the sign above the cattle chute says, "greener pastures."

There probably isn't a sign.

3. Is the music I'm hearing from the score to a horror film or the young violin protege in the 'studio?'

Against my better judgement, I decided to proceed. On the other side of the doors was a mother and son sitting on the sofa in the 'foyer.' The son had drum sticks and was still alive - so instantly I felt a bit better. My instructor soon appeared. He's Grizzly Adams' youngest son and plays a mean mandolin.

All's well that ends well...for now.